Welcome to Know What I Mean! The Web Site just for Ernest-Lovers! This site is filled with movies they should have made while Jim Varney was alive. |
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1. Ernest Saves India 2. Ernest vs. Mr. T 3. Ernest Eats a Sandwich 4. Ernest and Vern's Excellent Adventure 5. Ernest Strikes Back 6. Ernest Cleans His Carpet 7. Ernest Meets His Armpit 8. Ernest and the Dentist's Office 9. Ernest's Knitting Circle 10. Ernest and the Big Tree 11. Ernest's Volcanic Adventure 12. Ernest Dies of Frostbite 13. Ernest Gets Attacked by a Squirrel 14. Ernest Gets Deported 15. Ernest vs. the Pope 16. Ernest Thong Adventures 17. Ernest Gets Arrested for Indecent Exposure 18. Ernest Joins a Nomadic Indian Tribe 19. Ernest and the Metric System 20. Ernest Signs the Declaration of Independence 21. Ernest and the Elephant Man 22. Ernest Drinks Hydrochloric Acid 23. Ernest Accidently Runs Over his own Grandmother 24. Ernest Kills Seven Children with a Hammer and his Home PC 25. Ernest vs. the Fonz 26. Ernest Likes Teeth 27. Ernest Eats His Weight in Walnuts 28. Ernest vs. Ernest 29. Ernest Travels Back in Time to Marry Susan B. Anthony 30. Ernest Adopts a Rhesus Monkey 31. Ernest, Vice President of Equador 32. Ernest Gets a Conjugal Visit 33. Ernest Gets "Fixed" 34. Ernest and the Seven Interracial Ghost Children 35. Ernest Punches Gandhi 36. Ernest Punches Gandhi Again! 37. Ernest Gets Publically Beaten 38. Ernest Washes Some Immigrants 39. Ernest Becomes a Big Brother to a Spanish Boy named PePe 40. Ernest Vomits on the Prime Minister 41. Ted Turner presents The Ernest Super Bowl Half-Time Show 42. Ernest Endorses Doritos 43. Ernest has Peace-Talks with the Evil King of Penguins 44. Ernest IS Murphy Brown 45. Deprately Seeking Ernest 46. Ernest is Blinded by Mosquito-Spray 47. A Whiter Shade of Ernest 48. Ernest and the Prison Shower-Gang 49. Ernest's Face Meets a Deep Fryer 50. Ernest at the Fish Market 51. Ernest Meets Vincent Price 52. Ernest Fights Denzel Washington... and WINS!!! 53. Ernest Makes a Phony Phone Call to Former President Jimmy Carter 54. Ernest's U.S. Citizenship Expires 55. Ernest Renues his Library Card 56. Ernest and the Cheese Grater 57. Ernest Sells all of Ringo Starr's Belongings on eBay for $16.75 58. Ernest Gets in on the Christian Rock Market 59. Ernest Beats an Assailant with a Wire Clothes Hanger 60. Ernest Saves Arbor Day 61. Ernest Replaces Theo Huxtable on the Cosby Show 62. Ernest and Gilbert Gottfried Resurrect the Dead 63. Ernest Rides The Wheelbarrow 64. Ernest Slaps Tony Randall 65. Ernest Joins an Eskimo Country Club 66. Ernest: Amputee Rescue Chief 67. Ernest vs. the Fat Restaurant Mascot 68. Ernest and the Ted Danson Sitcom Project 69. Ernest P. Worrell: Moonshiner by Day, Sexy Private Eye by Night 70. Ernest and the Summer of Chocolate 71. Ernest Toasts King George VIII 72. Ernest and the Shamrock Seven 73. Ernest Dates a 1950's Ghost Girl 74. Ernest Gets his Credit Card Numbers Stolen 75. Ernest Monopolizes the Steel Industry 76. Ernest is Indicted for Arson 77. Ernest Discovers Beryllium 78. Ernest Coaches the Indiana Pacers 79. Ernest Logs On: The Internet Adventure 80. Ernest vs. The Queen Mother: Mad Dog Returns 81. Ernest Bites a Live Rooster 82. Ernest Assassinates the Prime Minister of Ireland 83. Ernest Sues the Tooth-Fairy 84. Ernest Hates David Blaine: Street Magician 85. Ernest Gets Booted out of The Globe Theatre 86. Ernest Gets Mad-Cow Disease 87. Ernest Force Feeds the Elderly 88. Ernest and Desmond Tutu in "RainForest Ruckus" 89. Ernest Receives his Food Stamps 90. Ernest IS A Web-Footed Aristocrat 91. Ernest and the Drunken Acrobat 92. Ernest and the World's Smallest Clown Car 93. Ernest Hijacks the GoodYear Blimp 94. Ernest Counts Sheep...to Death 95. Ernest Liberates North Dakota 96. Ernest Robs the Alamo of its Dignity 97. Ernest: Brick-Layer Extraordinaire 98. Ernest Denounces Calvin Coolidge 99. Ernest and Detective Monkey 100. Ernest Invests in an Unsuccessful Foreign Clock Factory 101. Ernest Orders a TAB Soda 102. Ernest Becomes an Uncle to some Ferrets 103. Highway to the Ernest-Zone 104. Ernest Loses the Ten Commandments 105. Ernest Endorses OK Soda 106. Ernest Explores an Elephant Graveyard 107. Ernest Bites the Big One 108. Ernest and the Ugandian Journey 109. Ernest "Accidently" Slices Dorthy Hamill's Neck with his Figure Skate 110. Ernest Takes a Taxi to Sweden 111. Ernest Moons Everyone! 112. Ernest Hates Joan & Melissa Rivers 113. Ernest is Killed in a Brush Fire 114. Ernest is Beaten to Death in the New York Mets Dug-Out 115. Ernest Builds a Shrine to Rob Reiner 116. Ernest Wins the Kentucky Derby 117. Ernest Locks his Keys in his Car 118. Ernest Steals Janet Reno's Heart 119. Ernest and the Robotic Man-Servant 120. The Great Ernest Caper 121. Silence of the Ernest 122. Ernest Suffocates a Mongoose 123. Ernest Rents "Ernest Saves Christmas" 124. Ernest is Blinded by the Headlights of a Pontiac 125. Ernest Chokes on a Red Crayola Crayon 126. Air Ernest 127. Ernest vs. the Nation of Zimbabwe 128. Leave it to Ernest 129. Ernest Fills out his Tax Returns 130. Ernest and the Julia Louis-Dreyfus Assassination 131. Ernest and The Olsen Twins Massacre 132. Ernest is Reincarnated as Mr. Miagi 133. Ernest's Tragic Addiction to Ketchup 134. Ernest Loves ZIGGY 135. Ernest & Secretariat: A Love Story 136. Ernest Offends an Ethnic Minority 137. Ernest Directs a Dog Food Commercial 138. Ernest Ruins the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade 139. Ernest Gets Lost in his own Apartment Complex 140. Ernest Vomits at Disney World 141. Ernest Throws the HeavyWeight Championship 142. Ernest Meets a Mime 143. Ernest Steps on a Landmine 144. Ernest and Raquel Welch Duke it Out 145. Snow White and the Seven Dwarves...and Ernest 146. Ernest Inadvertantly Marries his Cousin David 147. Ernest Invents a Breakdancing Robot 148. Ernest & Pauly Shore: Together at Last 149. Ernest and The Tony Danza Kid 150. Ernest Beats the Crap out of a Blockbuster Video Executive 151. Ernest Coughs Up a Quarter, Two Nickels, and a Dime 152. Ernest Sings Billy Idol's Greatest Hits 153. Ernest Packs Heat 154. Ernest Flies South for the Winter 155. Ernest Flips Off Johnny Carson 156. Ernest Salutes GameShow Host Richard Dawson 157. Ernest's Guest Appearance on Match Game 74 158. Ernest Dethrones the King of Cartoons 159. Ernest Dies on the Toilet 160. "Ernest Scared Stupid" Wins a Golden Globe for Best Set Design 161. Ernest Robs a Blood Bank 162. Ernest Furnace Burn Us 163. Ernest Stops Taking His Heart Medication 164. Ernest Boycotts the Dewey Decimal System 165. Ernest, Using Only Windex and an Iguana, Causes Illiteracy Throughout Indonesia 166. Double-O Ernest 167. Ernest Builds a Lop-Sided House 168. Ernest On Ice 169. Ernest Produces an Animated Wildlife Documentary 170. Ernest Foils the Montgomery Bus Boycott 171. 10 Things Ernest Hates About Carrot Top 172. Ernest Plagurizes an Encyclopedia 173. Ernest: The Traveling Street Peddler 174. Ernest Reinvents the English Language 175. Ernest vs. The Ninja Zookeeper 176. Ernest: Strongest Man in Delaware 177. Ernest Sets Fire to a Major Box-Making Company 178. Ernest is an Extra in Rocky IV 179. Ernest Plans a Presidential Funeral for James Garfield 180. Ernest Hosts a UPN Reality Series Involving George Wendt 181. Ernest: Hero of the Battle of Midway 182. How Ernest Ruined Robert Downey Jr.'s Induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame 183. The Fateful Maiden Voyage of the H.M.S. Ernest 184. Ernest Names his Dogs after Characters from the Hit ABC Sitcom "Home Improvement" 185. Who Framed Roger Rabbit? II: It Was Ernest 186. Ernest Shops Around for a New Pair of Prescription Lenses 187. Ernest Sends a Complaint Letter to the Good People at Maxwell House Coffee 188. Ernest Finally Beats Super Mario Bros. 3 189. Ernest Writes a Series of Victorian Novellas under the Pen-Name Beatrice St. Cloud 190. Ernest Ghostwrites a Biography on Carol Channing 191. Ernest P. Worrell stars as James Bond in "Goldfinger 2: Goldfinger's Revenge" 192. Ernest Tries to Fix his Sink without having to Call a Plumber 193. Ernest Reads "The Gettysburg Address" to a Local Second Grade Class 194. Ernest Starts a Ska Band with the Help of a Travelling Vagabond 195. Ernest Burns off his Eyebrows ...On Purpose! 196. Ernest Bites a Flight Attendant 197. Ernest Makes the Switch from Boxers to Briefs 198. Ernest Makes it to the Cover of Vanity Fair Magazine 199. Ernest asks a Kitten to Marry Him only to be Turned Down 200. Ernest? 201. Ernest Urinates on Little Richard's Face for $15.00 202. Ernest Performs Complicated Heart Surgery to Save the President of India 203. Ernest Writes the Number One Sitcom on Cambodian TV 204. Ernest Finds John Henson in a Dumpster Outside ABC Studios 205. Ernest Invests in a Refridgerator Magnet Factory 206. Ernest Wrote This Movie 207. Ernest Hosts SNL and Gets Assassinated on Live Television 208. Ernest Repaints the Statue of Liberty Neon Pink 209. Ernest Dates Hitler 210. Ernest Loses to a Mongoose in a Game of Cricket 211. Ernest vs. a Giant Squid Named Barnabus 212. Ernest Writes an Episode of "Three's Company" Only to find out it had been Cancelled Decades Earlier 213. Ernest Loses a Thirty-Year Battle with Scurvy 214. Ernest Invents an Odorless Perfume 215. Ernest Pogos his Way into the Hearts of Millions 216. Ernest Creates a Jig-Saw Puzzle Depicting the Life Story of James Earl Jones 217. Ernest Provides Vital Forensic Information in the O.J. Simpson Case 218. Ernest Eats a Carrot without Using his Hands 219. Ernest Gets a Part-Time Job at a Ball-Bearing Factory 220. Ernest Plays Billiards 'Til it Hurts 221. Ernest Blows Up the Moon and Sends the Earth Spiraling into the Sun 222. Ernest Gets Hit in the Groin by a Small Child 223. The Ernest Confessions: Tales of a Bus Driver 224. Ernest Goes Swimming 26 Minutes After Eating Lunch 225. Ernest Becomes the National Bird of Manchuria 226. Ernest Creates "Auntie Ernest's New England Maple Syrup" 227. Ernest and Mr. T Star in "I Pity the Foo' Who Doesn't Know What I Mean" 228. Ernest Licks a Doorknob 229. Ernest: Telekinetic Crime Buster 230. Ernest Can't Read: Oh Wait, Yes He Can 231. The Trial of the Century: Ernest vs. a Sock Puppet 232. Thou Shalt Not Ernest 233. Ernest High Dives into a Thimble Full of Water 234. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV: The Secret of the Ernest 235. Ernest 2525 236. Ernest Disproves the Pythagorean Theorum 237. Ernest Reads His Fan Mail: A Two-Minute Long Short Film 238. Ernest 'N the Hood 239. Why I Threw a Rock Through Bill Murray's Windshield: The Ernest P. Worrell Story 240. Ernest Sets Fire to a Three-Story Brownstone 241. Ernest Visits the Winslow Family on "Family Matters" 242. Ernest Beats the Muppets in a Chess Tournament and Takes Second Place 243. Ernest Goes to College to Become a Matador 244. Ernest Invents a Neck-Tie for Dolphins 245. Ernest Befriends a Tennis-Playing Clergyman with a Heart of Gold 246. Ernest vs. Dyan Cannon 247. The Ernest, the Witch, and the Wardrobe 248. Ernest Makes Out with a Catcher's Mitt 249. Ernest Fights Communism with a Pitchfork 250. Ernest Whips It, Whips It Good 251. Ernest, She Wrote 252. Ernest Unexpectedly Dies of a Bee Sting 253. Ernest vs. the Johnson-Worrell's: The Step-Children Fight Back 254. Ernest Has A Duck For A Roomate! 255. Ernest Sues Billy Blanks for the Tae-Bo Copyright 256. Ernest Destroys France with a Legion of Butterflies 257. Ernest IS Whitey Bulger 258. Ernest Accuses a Custodian of Witchcraft 259. Ernest Robs the First National Bank of CandyLand 260. Ernest Sews a Quilt Depicting the Struggle for Women's Equality 261. Ernest Milks a Cow...With His Mind! 262. Ernest Eats Lunch with Ernest Hemmingway and Ernest Borgnine 263. Ernest Gives Strom Thurmund an Atomic Wedgie 264. Ernest Replaces Amy Jo Johnson as the Pink Power Ranger 265. Ernest HATES Ray Combs 266. Ernest Goes on a Three-Year Quest to Find Marc Summers 267. Ernest Makes His Seventh Appearance on COPS 268. Ernest and Sandra Bullock Do America 269. Ernest Gives the Word "Obscene" a Whole New Meaning 270. Ernest and the "Get Smart" Reunion Special that Almost Wasn't 271. Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Ernest 272. Ernest, the Middle-Aged Witch 273. Ernest Learns the Art of Manufacturing Ping-Pong Balls 274. Midnight in the Garden of Good and Ernest 275. Ernest Bathes in a Tub Filled with Mercury 276. Ernest Loses $30.00 to a Gypsy Dog 277. Ernest Dedicates Eight Years of His Life to the Rubik's Cube 278. Ernest Survives 40 Days and 40 Nights of Non-Stop FOX Programming 279. Ernest Battles the Space-Jousting Monkeys 280. Ernest Knits a Kayak 281. Ernest Fixes the Leaning Tower of Pisa...and Destroys the World 282. Ernest Holds a Wedding for his Washer and Dryer 283. Joe vs. the Volcano vs. Ernest 284. Ernest Hopscotches Across America 285. Ernest Marries Betty Crocker to Further His Own SnackCake Industry Goals 286. Ernest Leads the Buffalo Bills to Superbowl Humiliation 287. Ernest's Adventures While Locked in a Gas Station Bathroom 288. Ernest Toasts Carroll O'Connor for Seventy-Six Years Well Done 289. Ernest and his 1,001 Uses for Masking Tape 290. Ernest Drinks the Pacific Ocean 291. Where's Ernest? 292. Ernest: The Animated Series: The Movie 293. Ernest Waits in Line at the Bank 294. Ernest Shovels His Driveway 295. Ernest Attacks his Neighbors with a Rake 296. Ernest Babies 297. MTV Rejects Ernest's Controversially Violent Music Video 298. Ernest Directs an A&E Biography on Morgan Fairchild 299. Ernest Laughs, Cries, and Falls in Love with a Can of Cranberry Sauce 300. "Did You Open The Window?": Ernest's Last Words 301. Ernest is Diagnosed with Bea Arthuritis 302. Ernest Practices Pole-Vaulting For No Reason 303. Ernest Sells His Body To Science 304. Mmmm!...Ernest Loves Rice 305. Ernest and the Freckles of Death 306. Aloha Ernest! 307. Shazam!: The Ernest P. Worrell / Jim Nabors Story 308. Ernest Accidently Kills Batman for the Third Time 309. "Ernest Teaches Typing" is Released to the Masses 310. Ernest and the 9 PM Curfew of Doom 311. Ernest Experiments With Time Travel 312. Ernest Buys a Vowel 313. Ernest Lowers His Monthly Mortgage Payments 314. Ernest Eats Hoyle Playing Cards for a Living 315. Ernest Didn't Pay a lot for His Muffler 316. Ernest Beats a Small Child to Death with a Phone Book 317. Ernest Climbs Mount Everest to Build Some Offices 318. Ernest Teaches Fire Prevention at a Local Youth Center 319. Find Ernest Now! 320. Ernest Knows a Kid with a Yo-Yo 321. Ernest and LensCrafters: A Winning Combination! 322. Ernest Brings an End to the Hallmark Greeting Card Company with One Ill-Timed Bald Joke 323. Ernest vs. Ike: A Battle for Tina Turner's Heart 324. Ernest Rips the Netting in his Bathing Suit 325. Ernest Visits Omaha, Nebraska 326. Ernest Makes Whoopee...PIES! 327. Ernest vs. the Amish 328. Ernest's Professional Knot-Tying Service 329. Ernest Punches McDonald's Employees Like There's No Tomorrow 330. Ernest Wins the Olympics (With Magic Powers) 331. "I Really Don't Like Waffles": A Night of Ernest's Poetry 332. Ernest Loves New York City 333. Ernest Brushes his Teeth with Pasta Sauce 334. Ernest Realizes He's Been Eating Baby Food for the Past Eleven Years 335. Ernest Takes a Pencil Sharpener to His Own Face 336. Ernest Gets Fired from the LEGO Corporation After Swallowing One Too Many Bricks 337. Ernest and the Chocolate Factory...of Death 338. Ernest Wears a Really Fat Dog as a Hat 339. Ernest Goes To Yale 340. The Importance Of Being Ernest 341. Ernest Lives Off Coffee Grounds for the Entire Month of November 342. Ernest vs. the Sahara Desert 343. Ernest is Sentenced to Death for Loitering 344. Ernest Sneaks into England's Parliament and Slightly Reduces Wheat Tariffs 345. Ernest Collects His Own Hangnails 346. Ernest and Martin van Buren Change Places for a Day on a Hilarious Bet 347. Ernest Exhibits Chronic Heartburn Symptoms 348. Ernest Scores a 19 on his SATs 349. Ernest: First President of Earth 350. Ernest Grows a Seven Foot Long Beard and Trips Over It 351. Ernest Screams an Obsenity at the Supermarket Checkout Line 352. Ernest Sneezes Twice in a Row 353. Ernest Gets Stranded on Rhode Island 354. Ernest Steals a Box of Pens But Returns it and Apologizes 355. Ernest Stops and Drops, But Forgets to Roll and Burns to Death 356. Ernest vs. an Evil Canadian Mounty 357. Ernest Puts the Three Stooges Out of Their Misery 358. The Great Ernest Search 359. Ernest Paints a Picture Frame With His Own Tears 360. Ernest Helps Jean Stapleton Install a Nintendo Entertainment System 361. Sticks and Stones Break Forty-Seven Bones in Ernest's Body 362. Ernest Takes a Bite out of Crime 363. Ernest Releases a Board Game that Deals with Important Teen Issues 364. Ernest Gets Maimed by a Kite on His Own Wedding Day 365. Ernest Endorses The Republican National Party 366. Ernest Shoots a Penguin in the Face 367. Ernest High-Fives Mother Teresa 368. Ernest Ironically Loses his Vision While Lowering his Venetian Blinds 369. Ernest Creates a Flesh-Eating Mastadon 370. Where in the World is Ernest Sandiego...and his New Wife? 371. Ernest and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat 372. Ernest Accidently Joins the Mafia 373. Ernest Transforms a Local High School into a Theme Park Devoted to Shelley Long 374. Ernest Needs Braces! 375. Ernest Falls Asleep on the Subway and Wakes Up in a Hot-Tub Filled with Indians 376. Ernest Struggles to Understand the Third Amendment 377. Ernest Beats John Stamos to Death with a Sock Filled with Oranges 378. Ernest Uses a Bicycle Pump to Seduce the Rockettes 379. Ernest Prefers Dick York Over Dick Sergeant 380. Ernest Plays Capture-the-Flag Against a Team of Nuns 381. T-Senre: Ernest's Evil Twin 382. Do the Ernest!: An Ernest Dancing Special 383. Ernest Gnaws on Some Horse Bones 384. Ernest and Idaho Secede from the Union 385. Ernest Gets into an Argument with a Can of Beans 386. Ernest Races a Rabbit with a Broken Leg 387. Ernest Painfully Shoves a Pen Up His Nose 388. Ernest Loses his Voice from Yelling at Babies Too Much 389. Ernest IS Cliff Clavin 390. Ernest Relieves Himself All Over a Carpet Store 391. Ernest Takes a 9-Iron to Betty White's Face 392. Ernest Jumps into a Pile of Leaves... and Broken Glass Bottles 393. Ernest Memorizes the Contents of a Russian-English Dictionary for Fun and Profit 394. Ernest Melts the Polar IceCaps Using Items He Bought at a Yard Sale 395. Ernest Hires a Hitman to Kill the Masked Magician 396. Ernest Publically Admits that Vern was Actually a Toaster 397. Ernest P. Worrell's Day Off 398. Ernest Swallows a Half-Gallon of Wite Out 399. Ernest is Hit by a Train on His Way to the Barber 400. Ernest Mistakes Stephen King for an Actual King 401. Ernest Swims to China 402. Ernest Hot-Wires a School Bus with His Tongue 403. Maximum Ernest-Drive 404. Ernest Reconciles with the Fat Restaurant Mascot 405. Ernest P. Worrell: The "P" Stands for Podiatry 406. You Made Ernest's Ghost Cry! 407. It's Arbor Day, Ernest 408. Ernest vs. Shredder 409. Ernest Brings a Wooden Boy to Life 410. Ernest Throws a Puppy into a Ceiling Fan 411. Ernest Races Glaciers! 412. All That and a Bag of Ernest 413. Ernest and Tonya Harding Make Up a Cool Secret Handshake 414. Ernest Marries a She-Wolf Named Susan 415. Ernest Searches the Seven Seas for Hector the SeaDog 416. Ernest: Transylvanian Luge Champion 417. Ernest Beats Rod Roddy in a Glass-Blowing Competition 418. Big Top Ernest 419. Ernest Gives Piano Lessons to an Octopus 420. Ernest Compares Prices on Farm Equipment 421. Ernest Uses a Garden Hose to Hog-Tie an Elderly Gentleman 422. The Adventures of Ernest...and Carl! 423. Ernest Drops All Assault Charges Filed Against Larry Bird 424. Ernest is Pregnant! 425. Ernest Kills a Crab with a Flashlight 426. Ernest of Arabia 427. Ernest Plays Twister with Twisted Sister 428. Got Ernest? 429. Ernest Gets Medieval on the Smurfs 430. James and the Giant Ernest 431. Ernest Purchases Some In-Line Skates 432. Ernest Comes Back from the Grave to Return a Video He had Rented 433. Ernest Eats his own Liver with Some Fava Beans and a Bottle of Chianti 434. Ernest Decapitates an Unnamed Beardless Former President 435. Ernest Drives a 1992 Dodge Caravan 436. Ernest is Jealous of His Richer and More Successful Brother Mike 437. Ernest's RadioShack Addiction 438. Ernest Models Swimsuits for Redbook Magazine 439. Ernest Shines a Governor's Boots 440. Ernest Goes to Fat Camp 441. Ernest Can Read Binary Code 442. Ernest Reeks of Liquid Hand Soap 443. The Nine Ernest-eers 444. Hey Fern! It's Ernest! 445. Ernest Has the Power to Heal Mermaids 446. Ernest Teams Up with William H. Macy to Save the Lion's Club 447. Ernest Goes Window-Shopping for a Wedding Dress 448. Ernest Triumphantly Defeats Pat Sajak and His Minions 449. Ernest Collects Trading Cards Depicting Heroes of the Civil War 450. Ernest Battles David the Gnome for Control of the Mystical Forest 451. Ernest Learns His Miranda Rights... The Hard Way 452. Ernest Wins an Emmy for His Guest Appearance on "Becker" 453. Ernest Uses a Frozen Sample of His Own Urine to Create a Fun Snack for Children 454. Ernest: Texas Ranger 455. Ernest Sure Plays a Mean Pinball 456. Ernest vs. Pac-Man 457. Ernest Plays Monopoly with the Ghost of Gene Siskel 458. Ernest Fries an Egg on a Fat Man's Stomach 459. Ernest and the Dana Carvey Bandit 460. Mork & Mindy & Ernest 461. Ernest in the Middle 462. Ernest Can't Believe that "Sister, Sister" is Still on the Air 463. Ernest Accidently Sets Fire to a Small Boy in a Wheelchair 464. Ernest Gets Legally Adopted By Mr. Feeny 465. Ernest P. Worrell: Caucasian Sensation 466. Ernest Wears a Burlap Sack Over His Head in Shame 467. Ernest Meets the Flintstones 468. Happy Super-Thanksgiving, Ernest! 469. Ernest Divorces His Cousin David After Fourteen Months of Marriage 470. Ernest Has Bad Posture 471. Ernest Discovers the Fountain of Youth But Mistakes It for a Toilet 472. Ernest Sells His Brother Into Slavery 473. Ernest Uses a Hair-Dryer to Win the Lottery 474. Ernest Trains to Become an Imperial Stormtrooper 475. Ernest Ernest Bo-Bernest: The Movie 476. I Can't Believe It's Not Ernest! 477. Ernest Has Heart-Worms 478. G.I. Ernest: The Real Canadian Hero 479. "I'll Take Ernest For The Block": A Hollywood Squares Adventure 480. Ernest Fills the Grand Canyon with Lime Jell-O 481. Ernest Uses Blood Money to Start a Dot-Com Business 482. Ernest Pushes a Fat Guy Down a Flight of Stairs 483. Star Wars: Episode VII: The Phantom Ernest 484. Ernest and His Fraudulent Handicapped Parking Brigade 485. Ernest Builds a Rope-Bridge Made Entirely of Twizzlers 486. Ernest: The Anti-Drug 487. Ernest Wins "Survivor: Milwaukee" 488. Ernest Befriends the Saddest Dog on Earth 489. Ernest: Banana-Throwing Library Assistant 490. Ernest Leads an Old Lady into the Path of a Mack Truck 491. Ernest Does a Cartwheel Straight into a Wall 492. Ernest Finally Changes His Clothes 493. Ernest Pays Child Support To Nell Carter 494. Ernest vs. Moby Dick 495. Ernest Takes Oprah for a Walk on a Leash 496. Ernest Shows Off His California-Shaped Birthmark 497. Ernest: Dentist to the Stars 498. Ernest Disrobes and Rides a Horse Across America 499. An Ernest Christmas Carol 500. Ernest Creates a List of Films He Should Have Been In 501. 1-800-4-ERNEST 502. Ernest For Hire 503. Ernest Gets Deep-Fried 504. Ernest Goes Hog Wild! 505. Ernest Plays Ping-Pong Like It's Nobody's Business 506. Boxcar Ernest and the Shoebox Full of Nails 507. Saving Private Ernest 508. Ernest Grows a Bristly Mustache 509. Ernest Sends a Postcard to Some Relatives 510. Ernest Looks in the Mirror and Realizes that He's White Trash 511. Ernest Street-Races for the Love of the Penguin Queen 512. Ernest IS Spartacus 513. Ernest Actually Pops a Weasel 514. Ernest Saves Swiss Miss 515. Ernest Takes a Bullet for Ronald McDonald 516. Ernesto es Loco! 517. Ernest and the Last Digit of Pi 518. Ernest Accidently Runs The Man in the Yellow Hat Down with His Car 519. Ernest P. Worrell vs. Stephen Q. Urkel 520. Ernest Sees the Ghost of John! 521. Ernest Uses a Wrecking-Ball to Destroy Saturn 522. Let There Be Ernest 523. Ernesto Worrelli: Ernest's Sexy Alter-Ego 524. Ernest Rides A Hen 525. Ernest Uses The Triforce of Wisdom to Win at Gin Rummy 526. Ernest Explains It All 527. Ernest: Terminally-Blind Lifeguard 528. Ernest Gets Chalk-Dust in His Eyes 529. Ernest Plays Bass for Iron Maiden 530. Ernest Decorates His Christmas Tree With Pig Entrails 531. Ernest vs. Apollo Creed 532. Ernest Gets Knighted By Queen Latifah 533. You Can't Spell "Ernest" Without "Nest"! 534. Ernest Wins "The 4th Annual Charles Nelson Reilly Relay Race" 535. Ernest Sells Midgets Via The Internet 536. Ernest Perms His Back-Hair 537. Its A Wonderful Ernest 538. Ernest Unexpectedly Bursts Into Flames 539. Ernest Contracts the Chicken Pox for the Fourth Time 540. While Ernest Gently Weeps: A Salute to George Harrison 541. Six Degrees of Ernest Eating Bacon 542. Ernest Eats a Baby for Charity 543. Ernest Declares Thursday to be the Greatest Day of the Week 544. Ernest Brews His Own 7-Up 545. Ernest Queered Stupid 546. Ernest Invalidates the Magna Carta 547. Grand Funk Ernest 548. Ernest vs. Mecha Godzilla: Battle of the 700-Foot Titans 549. Ernest Cuts Off the Magic School Bus 550. Ernest Eats a Baby for Fun 551. Sic Semper Ernest! 552. Ernest's Last Visit to Wendy's: A Tribute to Dave Thomas 553. Ernest Rubs the Lotion on His Skin and Puts it in the Basket 554. Ernest Trips Over The Eiffel Tower 555. Ernest Has A Dream That He Meets Ray Ramano 556. Ernest Catches Lucky the Leprochaun 557. Ernest Gradually Turns Into A Dalmation 558. Ernest Really Needs A Job 559. Ernest IS an Encyclopedia-Selling Primate 560. Ernest vs. Mighty Morphin' Angela Lansbury 561. Ernest Locks Estelle Getty Inside A Pay-Toilet 562. Ernest Drives a Railroad Spike into the Side of a Hippo 563. Ernest Steps Out Of His Pants 564. Not Another Ernest Movie 565. Ernest Gets His Face Caught In Some Machinery 566. Ernest Hosts "America's Funniest Home Videos" For Nine Unforgettable Seasons 567. Ernest Sells His Soul to the Devil for a New Pair of Sunglasses 568. Ernest Earns His PhD In Hula Dancing 569. Ernest Produces a Sequel to "Encino Man" 570. Ernest Has the Hots for Timothy Dalton 571. Ernest vs. Murray the Used Car Salesman 572. The Man From E.R.N.E.S.T. 573. Ernest Washes His Robotic Grandfather 574. Ernest Has An Overactive Bladder 575. Where's Ernest? In Hollywood 576. Ernest Teaches Karate to a Group of Fun-Loving Cactuses 577. Ernest Learns the Awful Truth About Mayonnaise 578. Ernest Kicks The Bucket 579. Ernest Kicks The Bucket II: Ernest Actually Kicks A Bucket 580. Ernest Wastes his Last $8.00 on an Autographed Picture of Rick Moranis 581. Ernest Sacrifices his own Ability to See to Save the Cast of "Taxi" 582. The Legend of Ernest 583. Ernest Throws a File Cabinet through a Plate-Glass Window 584. Ernest Exposes Himself On Live Television 585. Ernest Rides a Large Parrot to Work 586. Ernest Mathematically Determines the Superiority of Coke Over Pepsi 587. Ernest Gets Lost at Wal-Mart and Starves to Death 588. Ernest Runs to the Store After Running Out of Milk: Part VII 589. Ernest Gets Evicted From His Motel 6 Room 590. Ernest: Duke of All Media 591. Ernest vs. Pee-Wee Herman: The Battle of the Pathetic Comedians Who Live as Their Characters 592. Ernest Kicks a Complete Stranger in the Crotch 593. Ernest and the Garden of Barbara Eden 594. To Ernest, or Not to Ernest 595. Ernest Boycotts Breathing For Eleven Minutes 596. Ernest Turns his Back on the WNBA 597. Ernest Fills His Pockets With Boy Scouts 598. Ernest Builds a Homeless Shelter Inside a Lumberyard 599. Ernest Loves John and Sarah Hughes 600. February 10th, 2000: The Day the Ernest Died 601. Ernest Plants Land Mines on a Football Field and Waits Patiently for the Next Game 602. Ernest Complains About His Overcooked French Fries 603. It's a Nice Day for a White Ernest 604. Ernest vs. Some Skeletons 605. Ernest Fights for Canine Voting Rights 606. Ernest Accidently Sells Tobacco to Grade-School Students 607. I am Ernest 608. Ernest Holds a Surprise Birthday Party for a Lonely Park Ranger 609. Ernest Takes Over Chicago with an Army of Flying Squirrels 610. Ernest Makes Out With Markie Post for, Like, Forty-Five Minutes 611. Ernest Gets Friendly with an Astronaut 612. Ernest Invents a Television Microchip that Blocks Out All Forms of Jeff Foxworthy 613. Abbott and Costello Meet Ernest 614. Ernest vs. the Pope's Evil Cousin, Count Popeula 615. Ernest Attempts to Donate Blood but is Rejected Because He's Anemic 616. Ernest Didn't Eat Four Sugar Cookies 617. Ernest Breaks a Chain-Letter...with His Fist 618. Ernest Searches the Solar System for Jonathan Taylor Thomas 619. Ernest Starts Thinkin' Like Lincoln 620. Ernest Breaks One Rib Too Many 621. Ernest Takes Out a Loan He Can't Possibly Repay and Flees to Mexico 622. Ernest Swallows 17,000 Consecutive Eggs 623. Ernest Can't Decide What Color Hammer to Buy 624. Ernest Needs Braces! Part II: The Return of Jafar 625. Ernest Kills Superman With One Well-Placed Kick to the Abdomen 626. Ernest Dictates Bolivia 627. The Adventures of Ernest's Mousepad 628. Ernest vs. the LPA: The Little People of America 629. Ernest Writes a Seventy-Page Thesis on Why Brown Eggs are Better than White Ones 630. Ernest Ruins Shark Week...Again 631. "Ernest-o-Rama" Reaches the Bay of Fundy 632. Ernest and the Trans-Dimensional, Time-Travelin' Squirrel 633. Ernest and his Anti-Dwarfism Ray-Gun 634. Ernest Uses the Jaws of Life to Deliver his Cousin's Baby 635. Ernest Has Detatchable Skin 636. Ernest Replaces the Snuggle Bear as the Cutest Mascot Ever 637. Ernest Challenges a Hobo to a Game of Wiffle Ball 638. Ernest Pummels a Pastry Chef with a Barrage of Nerf Footballs 639. Ernest vs. Sexy-Mothra 640. Ernest and Mary Todd Lincoln: The Lusty Road to Success 641. Ernest Guards the Crown Jewels for One Outrageous Evening 642. Ernest Realizes that He Doesn't Need Lungs! 643. Ernest vs. the Mexicanadians 644. Ernest Wears a Kilt to Roseanne's Funeral 645. Ernest & Hooch 646. Ernest Befriends a Talking Puma 647. Ernest Hiccups for Six Months, Four Days, and Twelve Hours 648. Die Ernest, Die 649. Ernest Stars in Eleven Disney Channel Original Movies 650. Bubble-Chum!: Ernest Invents a Herring-Flavored Chewing Gum 651. Rock, Paper, Ernest 652. The Adventures of Ernest and Ernest 653. Ernest Maliciously Infringes on a Copyright 654. Ernest Writes a Novel Without Using the Letter T 655. Ernest Macks It with Shakespeare's Woman 656. Ernest Eats Eight Excellent Eggs: An Adventure in Alliteration 657. Ernest Sets a World Record by Moonwalking Across India 658. Ernest Speaks Strictly in Rhymes for Six Consecutive Years 659. Ernest and Brian Dennehy Duel on Banjos 660. Ernest Kills Colonel Mustard in the Conservatory with the Candlestick 661. Have Ernest Will Travel 662. Ernest Swims with the Miami Dolphins 663. Ernest Uses His Hypnotic Powers to Bring Back TGIF 664. Ernest Finds Jimmy Hoffa in his Washing Machine 665. Ernest Gives Smokey the Bear a Nicotine Patch 666. ERLA: Ernest Really Loves Acronyms 667. Ernest Makes One Too Many Jokes About S'mores 668. Ernest Could Have Sworn that His Calendar Talked to Him 669. Ernest Slaps a Rude Pet Store Owner 670. Ernest Finds the Long-Lost Olsen Triplet in the Amazon 671. Ernest Never Saw It Coming 672. Ernest is Relieved to Hear that his History Test has been Moved to Friday 673. Ernest Loses his Pet Clown in a Rainstorm 674. 4 out of 5 Ernests Agree 675. Ernest vs. Artie, the Strongest Man in the World 676. Ernest Falls Asleep on a Cat 677. How the Grinch Stole Ernest's Pants 678. Ernest and Vern's Bogus Journey 679. Don't Go There, Ernest! 680. Ernest Notices a Whale Rolling Down His Street 681. Ernest Wins Third Prize in an "Ernest Look-Alike Contest" 682. Ernest Tosses Medusa from a Speeding Train and Doesn't Regret a Thing 683. Twelve-Step Ernest 684. Ernest Becomes Mayor of Furniture City 685. Ernest is Happy...and He Knows It 686. I Love the Smell of Ernest in the Morning 687. Ernest Paints Himself Wearing a Tankini 688. Ernesthog Day 689. Ernest's Short-Lived Adventures as Assistant to the Manager of Sears 690. Ernest Just Can't Stop Watching "Aladdin"! 691. Ernest Falls in Love With His New Powdered Wig 692. Ernest Stops an Avalanche With His Bare Hands 693. Ernest Prices Rare Antiquities 694. Ernest Wakes Up in a Hobo's Beard 695. Ernest Puts the "Can" in "American" 696. Ernest Predicts It Will Be Cloudy with a Chance of Rain Tomorrow 697. Ernest Forgets to Call Chairman Mao the Morning After 698. Ernest's Rather Unhealthy Obsession with Harriet Tubman 699. Ernest Over-Starches His New Shirt 700. Ernest vs. Ms. Pac-Man 701. Ernest Creates a Cure for Cancer but Gambles it Away in a Poker Game 702. Ernest Finds a Photograph of a Midget Holding a Lizard: Based on a True Story 703. Ernest Sacrifices a Goat to Prove His Love for a Voodoo Priestess 704. Ernest Rocks The Vote! 705. Ernest Gets into College Because of Affirmative Action 706. Ernest vs. Two Dogs 707. Life is Like a Box of Ernest 708. Ernest Discovers the Lost City of Atlanta, Georgia 709. Ernest Helps a Friend Carry Some Heavy Packages 710. Ernest Denies the Existence of "Home Alone 3" 711. Gimme a Break!: Ernest vs. the Kit-Kat Corporation 712. Ernest is Shocked to See that He Has His Own "E! True Hollywood Story" 713. Ernest Beats a Man to Death for Calling Him Ernie 714. Ernest Purchases a New Pair of Slacks 715. Ernest Invents the Lottomobile for Gambling on the Go 716. Ernest Eats Two Aardvarks and a Bologna Sandwich 717. Ernest Shows Up at the Wrong Bar Mitzvah 718. Ernest: The Fat Years 719. Ernest Makes a Tasteless Michael Jackson Joke 720. Ernest Confuses Payroll With Parole 721. Ernest Wets Himself and Has to Go to the Nurse 722. Tuesdays With Ernest 723. Ernest Freezes His Underpants! 724. Paint Me Green and Call Me Ernest! 725. Ernest Designs His Own Coffin 726. I Know What You Did Last Ernest 727. Ernest Creates a Flesh-Flavored Ice Cream 728. Night of the Living Ernest 729. Honey, I Shrunk the Ernest 730. Ernest vs. Every Egyptian Pharaoh Ever 731. Ernest Gives Guided Tours through Public Restrooms 732. Ernest Likes Big Butts... and He Cannot Lie 733. Ernest Gloves Lucy 734. Ernest vs. Rue "Klux" McClanahan 735. Ernest Tickles a Dingo 736. Ernest Meets Will Smith and Dies Happy 737. Ernests: Flying Dune Buggy Pilot Extraordinaire 738. Ernest Thumbs Through the Pages of Oprah's Magazine and Likes What He Sees 739. Ernest Collapses the Universe Yet Again 740. Ernest, Jaleel White, and the Seventeen-Hour Ping-Pong Championship Match 741. Ernest Grows Wings But They Fall Off After a Week 742. Ernest and Morgan Freeman's Duet Album Bombs...Despite Critical Acclaim 743. Ernest Goes SSJ2 and Ka Meha Mehas Perfect Cell Up to Snake Way 744. Ernest Reintroduces Pogs to the World 745. Ernest Rekindles His Love Affair With Dairy 746. Ernest Eats Nothing But Coleslaw For A Decade 747. Ernest Experiments with Illegal Narcotics 748. Ernest Cracks the Bar Code with an Abacus and a Shopping Cart Full of Pixie Stix 749. Ernest Finishes the Tour De France in 739th Place 750. Ernest: The New Unpredictable Four-Eyed Pitcher for the Cleveland Indians 751. Ernest Becomes a Regular Cast Member After Several Guest Appearances on "Blossom" 752. Ernest Drop-Kicks a Clown into a Pit of Spikes 753. Dude, Ernest is Getting a Dell 754. Ernest Has Never Had Keish 755. Ernest and Steve Guttenberg's Printing Press 756. Ernest Helps Control the Pet Population by Having His Pets Spayed or Neutered 757. Ernest Becomes the Fifth Ghostbuster for Two Hours and Ten Minutes 758. Ernest vs. Moses: Lightsaber Duel to the Death 759. Ernest Finds a Retainer and Returns It to the Nearest Lost and Found Office 760. Ernest Conveniently Runs Out of Gas in Front of a Gas Station and Laughs in Triumph 761. Ernest Makes Action Figures of Himself and Sells them in Front of His House 762. Ernest Flashes a Janitor at an Elementary School in Alabama 763. Ernest Goes to Wal-Mart But They're All Out of Batteries 764. "Polio & Luigi": Ernest Experiments with Generic-Brand Video Games 765. Ernest Steps on a Crack and, Indeed, Breaks His Mother's Back 766. Ernest: Quickest Accountant in the Old West |
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